So Trump Got Shot
A lulzy event for sure
Disclaimer:
I am finding information about this story in real time, the below piece is merely a summary of the events of the last 24 hours, the situation is evolving constantly and I’m getting new updates every hour. I don’t want to present anything here as fact but suffice to say this is an insane situation and it’s difficult for me to keep ahead of. Please take everything you read here with a grain of salt, thank you.
-Rick
Yesterday I was visiting my aunt at the nursing home and as I was leaving another elderly woman came up to me on a walker and told me that Trump had been shot. I figured she was in the throes of dementia so I didn’t pay much mind to her, I was like “Yeah sure granny, whatever you say.” But then one of the nurses came up to me and asked if I could check if she was telling the truth with my phone. I quickly Googled Trump and was treated to a headline about an assassination attempt on Trump featuring footage of the former POTUS hitting the ground after touching his ear and then quickly being surrounded by Secret Service agents. Well, shit…
Political hacks from across the internet flooded social media with footage of the attempt along with Trump’s now iconic fist pumping rallying cry of “Fight, fight, fight” in the face of the assassin. Along with the footage came an abundance of far out conspiracy theories about the shooters identity and whether or not the Secret Service allowed the shooter to take the shot despite multiple warnings from attendees at the rally. So was this a sanctioned hit from the deep state? Was the SS in on it the whole time? Or was it just the simple fact that many government administrations are suffering from lack of standards and fitness as many other American industries?
Some low IQ rightoids are already making some strange accusations about Trumps would-be assassins, such as brilliant reactionary Stew Peters. I don’t want to editorialize but the “it’s the joooooos!” crowd has been espescially insufferable these last 24 hours, and trying to seperate fact from fiction while they flood the net with retarded conspiracy bullshit has been difficult.
Other right wingers were blaming gender equity standards for the SS leading up to the somewhat botched response to Trump being shot, posting this alleged exchange between male agents and a female one who was apparently behaving in an unprofessional matter after the attempt. Has feminism gotten to the point that former heads of state are now in danger?
Along with all the standard conservative blahtering about DEI comes a plethora of theories about the shooter himself, the first suspect that was identified by a large twitter account was Mark Violets, who they claimed to be associated with Antifa. Turns out the guy was just some Italian dude who was furious at being accused of being the would-be assassin. Swing and a miss Reddit.
The name Thomas Matthew Crooks was revealed next, people scoured the internet to try and find his socials and the famed reliable information source 4Chan had apparently identified the shooter as this man. Swing and a miss, Nazis.
Apparently one of the snipers who took out the shooter posted on the Chans as well, it wouldn’t be the first time a high clearance government official posted there and it kicked off more conspiratorial talk across the net. I don’t want to suggest any of this is verifiable information but it seems this sniper is confirming the above conspiracy of Chris Martenson where the SS may have hung Trump out to dry.
There was another Thomas Matthew Crooks on Instagram who had a very eyebrow raising bio. Apparently he’d started scrubbing his account after the news but right wing commentators desperate to tie the attempt to Antifa were still wildly speculating about him. Sorry chuds, this is too perfect to be real.
Also this guy is a big fan of Skvmlord, an online personality who also locked his main and private accounts on Instagram, but several images of him were scraped from his account and it’s apparent why we wanted to go dark. That said, these fits still go hard as fuck.
The there’s this guy, who was ID’d as the shooter by large online news sources, but it was later revealed it was just a prank that spiraled waaaay out of control. Probably not the best idea to crack a joke like this minutes after a former president was almost killed, he’s probably getting a knock on his door from the FBI as we speak. Kids, don’t try to do the Sam Hyde meme irl.
This image was going around of the alleged shooter as well and plenty of right wing weirdos were making the connection that he was Jewish, but it turns out this wasn’t the guy either. Again as with the skvmlord fan conspiracy loving reactionaries just can’t help themselves.
I was browsing around and found this article from Associated Press discussing the alleged shooter in much more detail than I was able to glean by browsing social media sites and the vague conspiracies presented therein. I’ve posted an excerpt of this article below.
Crooks graduated from Bethel Park High School in 2022. In a video of the school’s graduation ceremony posted online, Crooks can be seen crossing the stage to receive his diploma, appearing slight of build and wearing glasses. The school district said it will cooperate fully with investigators. His senior year, Crooks was among several students given an award for math and science, according to a Tribune-Review story at the time.
Jason Kohler, who said he attended the same high school but did not share any classes with Crooks, said Crooks was bullied at school and sat alone at lunch time. Other students mocked him for the way he dressed, such as hunting outfits, Kohler said.
“He was bullied almost every day,” Kohler told reporters. “He was just a outcast, and you know how kids are nowadays.”
Crooks’ political leanings were not immediately clear. Records show Crooks was registered as a Republican voter in Pennsylvania, but federal campaign finance reports also show he gave $15 to a progressive political action committee on Jan. 20, 2021, the day President Joe Biden was sworn into office.
Butler County district attorney Richard Goldinger told AP on Sunday that Crooks had been previously unknown to investigators in his county and had not been on their radar. He said the investigation had so far not turned up any evidence that he had coordinated with anyone else in the region.
A blockade had been set up Sunday preventing traffic near Crooks’ house, which is in an enclave of modest brick houses in the hills outside blue-collar Pittsburgh and about an hour’s drive from the site of the Trump rally. Police cars were stationed at an intersection near the house and officers were seen walking through the neighborhood.
Bomb-making materials were found inside Crooks’ vehicle near the Trump rally and at his home, according to two officials who were not authorized to speak publicly and spoke on condition of anonymity. A white Allegheny County Police truck identified as bomb squad pulled up to the home late Sunday morning.
But was it really Thomas Matthew Crooks, as confirmed by the FBI? Well let’s ask the man himself.
This was circulating last night while a bunch of people were still commenting on the events. And so far I don’t see too many people acknowledging this and still enaging in wild speculation about him. I don’t know if this is the guy from the photos either, they all look kind of similar and there’s so much bullshit going around I don’t feel confident in proclaiming this is the guy. But that didn’t stop people on Twitter from declaring him either a soyboy or MAGA shill.
There’s an image of the “actual” shooter after he was taken out by SS but it’s very gory so I won’t post it here lest I incur the wrath of Substack moderators, but I have included this link to it. There’s also a picture of the guy on the roof after being killed by the Feds guarding Trump, I also don’t know if this is safe to show on the website so I’ll include this link to it.
Apparently this guy is the real shooter, but I don’t want to confirm that although he does bear a striking resemblance to the dead guy on the roof. Apparently his name is Maxwell Yearick and he found himself in some trouble 7 years ago at an anti-Trump rally. Whether or not this is the actual guy is still up for debate.
I’m still speculating on whether or not any of this is real, I don’t want to present anything as fact until I’ve confirmed it I merely wanted to put out this piece to keep ahead of this news and I’ll probably wind up either updating this or posting a new piece in the next couple of days. For now this is all I have, thanks for reading and if you have any information you’d like to share you can reach me at @PraxisOfEvil on po.ast. Thanks for reading